Archive for the ‘My personal soap opera’ Category

I Hear The Secrets That You Keep….

Monday, November 9th, 2009

I have been known to talk in my sleep.  One of the most famous (in my house, at least!) occurrences was when I sat up in bed and blurted out about monkeys in the window.   When she was in high school, my daughter discovered that when she asked me math problems when I was dozing, my answers were correct and my explanations were cogent.

Last night, my wife woke me up several times to talk to me.  And she doesn’t remember most of what she said, or that she said anything at all, as she was still sleeping at the time.  She would say something, and I’d respond, “Huh?”  The only thing she remembers is that I woke her up when she told me that “his classroom is by the bathroom.”  Whose classroom?  Which bathroom?

The fact that she talks in her sleep, and I talk in my sleep, got me to wondering – do we have conversations with each other while we are sleeping that we are not even aware we are having?  And, if we do, what are we talking about?  Are we coming up with solutions to society’s ills?  Or are we talking about important stuff like monkeys in the windows of bathrooms by his classroom?

A Scarlet Letter, Or Should I Say, Checkbox

Wednesday, November 4th, 2009

When Number 7 was born, I filled out all of the necessary paperwork to be filled with the Oklahoma Department of Vital Records for his birth certificate.  On the form was a checkbox asking about the marital status of the parents – MARRIED or UNMARRIED.  At the time, I thought that that was unique, as I didn’t remember Illinois, Arkansas, or Texas asking that, but figured the information was used for statistical tabulations, and checked the MARRIED box.  I have found out, much to my surprise, that in Oklahoma that information is used to determine how much you have to pay for a birth certificate.

When Sunshine’s younger son was born, she was engaged to the future Ex Husband Segundo, but they were not married yet.  However, since they were already engaged when she got pregnant, they knew who the father was.  No big deal.  Right?

On Monday, we had to get Beam’s birth certificate to enroll him in school.  Since I had to get Number 7′s birth certificate earlier this year when I reinstated my insurance, I knew that the cost of a birth certificate is $15.  I was shocked when she told me that she had to pay an additional $25.  Why?  For paternity forms, because she was only engaged and not married when Beam was born.  Even though the father signed the birth certificate form!  Apparently, in Oklahoma, if your parents were not married when you were born, even if they were engaged and the identity of the father is known, it will cost you an additional $25 to get your birth certificate.  Yes, let’s persecute people until they die for a mistake, and lets not only punish those who made the mistake forever, let’s also punish the innocent, too! 

 And Oklahoma calls itself a Christian state!

And Now There Is Eleven

Monday, November 2nd, 2009

It was very prescient of Ex Husband Primo to drive 150 miles round trip in the middle of the night to drop off a bed that we didn’t need, for as it turns out, we did need it.

Sunshine had made plans with Ex Husband Segundo to pick up Beam for the Halloween weekend.  The original plan was to drive to Stillwater on Friday to pick him up, and then to bring him back on Sunday and bring Ray with us, so that Ray could spend some time with his grandfather.  As life would have, even the best-laid plans go to waste.

On Thursday, Ex Husband Segundo called to say that he and his wife of about a month (he knew her about a month when they got married) were splitting up, and that he was going to move back home to Wichita on Saturday.  This completely destroyed our plans, because now instead of going to Stillwater on Sunday, we’d have to go to Wichita, instead.  Well, okay, its about the same time to Wichita from Bartlesville as it is to Stillwater, so that’d be fine.  So we drive to Stillwater on Friday, pick up Beam, drop in for an hour to visit my father-in-law and his girlfriend, and then head home without a clue of what fate would have for us next.

Saturday afternoon, Sunshine gets a call from Ex Husband Segundo – there has been a change in plans.  He isn’t moving to Wichita over the weekend after all, he doesn’t know when he will be moving, so go ahead and keep Beam at least until the end of the year.  Suddenly, this extra bed which I was going to give away, is now needed!

So now, until the end of the year, the family is complete, with two parents and all nine kids.  I have joked with Sunshine that she will now experience what Grandmother Wilhelmina experienced, as she raised nine children, only in Grandma’s case, it was seven boys and two girls, while Sunshine and I have three girls and six boys.  It is going to be an adventure!

The Bed

Monday, November 2nd, 2009

Thursday morning, Sunshine was surprised when she stepped out onto the porch – someone had left a bed and a frame on it!  She asked the neighbors, but they were not the generous philanthropists.  she called me and asked if I knew that there was a bed on the porch, but I did not.  I did mention that we live on one of the main streets in town, and Bartlesville is a small, tight-knit community where everybody knows your name, so the possibilities were limitless.  Thursday evening, the mystery was solved, as Ex Husband Primo left her a voice message askingif we had gotten the bed he bought.  What makes it all the more amazing is that he lives 75 miles away and delivered it in the middle of the night.  I was duly impressed that he cared enough about his son, Ray (my oldest stepson), to drive two-an-a-half hours and 150 miles in the middle of the night to make sure he had a bed to sleep him.  Unbeknownst to him, when we got married, I gave Ray the brand new twin bed I bought when my ex moved out at the end of March. 

With the gift, we had an extra bed, and spent the next several days pondering what to do with it.  Well, as Providence would have it……

Moved By Meat Loaf

Thursday, October 29th, 2009

Number 1 and I went to Number 2′s fall choir concert last week.  As we sat up in the balcony, watching the various choirs performed, we noticed that the all of the boys in the co-ed choir looked like doofuses, with the exception of one boy – a friend of Number 2′s who looks like Meat Loaf.  When we met up with Number 2 after the performance, she was with a couple of her female friends, and we relayed our observation, which was greeted with disgust by her friends.

“You think he looks like meatloaf?  That’s not nice!”

“Not meatloaf the food.  Meat Loaf the singer.”

“Oh.  Who’s that?”

Sunday, in need of help moving Sunshine’s heavy furniture from her apartment to the house, Number 2 recruited her friend.  When I told him of my observation from the concert, he beamed proudly.  As a singer, he knew who I was referring to, and was proud of the comparison.  Really, if you’ve ever listened to “Bat Out Of Hell”, you’d understand that to be compared to the talented Meat Loaf is a compliment.

We arrived at the house, and the first order of business was to unload some heavy dressers from the trailer and carry some heavy dressers up the half-flight of stairs into the house and then up the full-flight of stairs to the bedrooms.  Number 2 cautioned Meat Loaf that the dressers were heavy and would require two people, and then Meat Loaf proceeded to lift a dresser by himself!  Holy crap!  Meat Loaf not only can sing, but is built like an ox! 

With the much appreciated help of Meat Loaf (and later on, his brother and another friend), Sunshine and I were able to successfully transport all of her big and heavy furniture from her place to the house without either one of us having to suffer back strain!

The Card

Wednesday, October 28th, 2009

Since Sunshine and Ray have moved in, we have swapped bedrooms in the house – I have traded my large bedroom to the four boys for the smallest bedroom.  With the bedroom swap has come swapping dressers, closets, etc.

When I got home last night, I asked Sunshine how the swapping project was going.  She told me that everything had been swapped.  I asked her if my special thing was still okay.  I received an affirmative, but a very sour look.

You see, I was talking about the giant Mr. Goodbars she gave me for my birthday and Father’s Day that I had hidden into the far corner of my closet to keep them from being eaten by persons other than myself.  She thought I was talking about a card that she found, an anniversary card from The Mistress.  Thus, her sad look.

She showed me the card, and I was surprised, because I had never seen it before.  The envelope had not been sealed, and apparently at some point in time The Mistress had left it in the corner of my closet for me to find, except that I never found it.  It was a store-bought anniversary card.  The surprise is what she had written on it.

Between the words “happy” and “anniversary” she had written “19th”.  In the left margin, she had written “forever”.  She signed it “Your wife” with her name.  Sunshine thought that it was a remnant of a previous time, and that is what bothered her.  After all, I would feel a bit sad if I found a sweet anniversary card from one of her previous husbands.  What was written, however, has kind of creeped me out.  You see, we never had a 19th Anniversary.  The divorce documents were signed 2 1/2 months before our 19th Anniversary.  When our 19th Anniversary date arrived, we were divorced, she was not my wife, and our marriage hadn’t been “forever.”

I set the card down somewhere, and don’t know where I set it at.  Those words have been stuck in my mind ever since.  What should I make of it?

(I don’t consider this a post about “The Mistress” per se, only an item that she had in her possession which is now in mine….)

That’s A Thumbs Up For Both Of Us!

Monday, October 26th, 2009

On the 3 1/2 drive from Bartlesville to Eureka Springs, Sunshine was getting a case of nerves, which were getting progressively worse as we got closer to our destination.  If you’ve never been to Eureka Springs, it is a beautiful city.  It is also just about impossible to get to!

The roads to Eureka Springs, especially from the north and west, are pretty much devoid of any straight stretches, as they are mountain roads that wind their way over the ridges and through the valleys.  Let’s just say that maps do not do these roads justice.  On the way their, we traveled on the north side of the state line on Missouri Route 90.  Let’s just say that is not a good choice when your passenger gets sick on roller coasters.

Route 90 ranks as one of the twistiest and windiest highways I have ever driven, and I have driven well over a half-a-million miles.  On the thirty-or-so miles we drove, I think we counted two passing zones; that’s it.  It not only twists and turns, it goes up and down some steep hills while doing so.  To top of the fun, it tilts as it twists, too, just like a roller coaster.  That presented a bit of a problem.  As we travelled further and further down 90, Sunshine felt more and more like she was going to lose her breakfast, except that in her excitement she had forgotten to eat breakfast, which only enhanced her feelings of nausea.

There is about a ten mile stretch of Missouri Hwy. 37 between Hwy. 90 and U.S. 62 in Gateway, Arkansas, that isn’t too bad, and Sunshine was starting to feel better when we hit the home stretch.  U.S. 62 between Gateway and Eureka Springs is a very pretty drive, but a very curvy one, as well.    So here we are driving U.S. 62, and Sunshine is once again feeling a bit green around the gills.  In between shouts of  “Don’t they know how to build straight roads in this place?” and “We’re above the trees! Don’t they know what guardrail is?”, I kept trying to distract her with the view, which only made it worse, as every time she admired the view, the worse she felt.

We finally made it, got our marriage license, ate a romantic lunch at McDonald’s, got married, and set out to see the town for a couple of hours.  What a difference a couple of hours makes!  After a couple of hours in Eureka Springs, it was a completely different Sunshine!  We went back out U.S. 62 the way we came, and Sunshine enjoyed the view, enjoyed the scenery, and understood why I like the mountains so much.  When we got back, we both agreed that even though it wasn’t a fancy wedding, and even though we didn’t get a honeymoon, we both enjoyed our wedding day in Eureka Springs; it will be a memory we will cherish for the rest of our lives!

Wedding Photos

Monday, October 26th, 2009

While we were getting hitched, we had the photographer take some pictures with our cameras.  I have posted the pics from my camera under  “Links”  if you want to see them.  However, just because we are very happy about our wedding and want to share our happy day with everybody, here is a link:

http://www.t2s2.org/michael/wedding.html

I’m Getting Married In The Morning…..

Friday, October 23rd, 2009

Okay, actually in the afternoon, but that’s not how the song goes! Sunshine and I are heading to Eureka Springs this morning, we say our vows at 2:30, and then its hurry on home so the kids can go to the football game, as our undefeated, 7-0, Bartlesville Bruins are taking on the also undefeated Jenks Cheaters. Then Saturday, it’s time to move Sunshine’s stuff into the house and move some stuff out! So, if you don’t hear from me for the next couple of days, that is why.

Seven, Eight, Nine Kids Is A Full Time Job

Friday, October 16th, 2009

It has been fall break this week, which means that the kids have been home.  All seven of them.  Well, Ray has been off, to, so make that eight.  No wait!  Sunshine has her younger son, Beam, for fall break, so that makes nine!  Yes, there have been nine children in the house (technically, since Number 1 is 18, she is not a child, but she kind of still is), which makes for a very busy house!  The past couple days have been a trial run of sorts for Sunshine in her soon to be full-time job as a stay-at-home Mom, and as she (and my sister and my Mother and all of those stay-at-home Moms out there) can attest, it is as demanding and challenging and rewarding as any career.

I cooked dinner for the army while she was on the way back from picking up Beam, and well, it’s mind boggling.  I had eleven plates.  Recipes have to be tripled.  Seating 11 people around a table is logistically challenging.  (Our solution – the offspring eat first, then the parents….)  For lunch, we consumed almost an entire loaf of bread.  There hasn’t been a single dull moment!  When you have nine offspring in a household, there is barely a minute that passes without one of the offspring needing parental supervision.

You want to know what is truly amazing?  Given the chaos that nine offspring produce, Sunshine hasn’t told me “Thanks, but no thanks!”  It takes a remarkable woman to want to be a parent to nine offspring, even when it means that she will have no time to pursue her own interests.  The wedding is still most definitely on, and both of us are excitedly looking forward to saying “I do”!